'well, sacrificing for your baby starts earlier this time,' said my dear friend mindy as i lamented to her over the phone the news i heard at my baby's doctor appointment this morning.
the history: the Eldest came into this world via c-section because she was breeched. my water broke at 38 weeks. she was 7 pounds 9 ounces. sweet. perfect. although, for me, the c-section recovery was a bit like. . hell. and at that time, i only had her to take care of. miss poopy shorts was a successful vbac (vaginal birth after cesarean). 8 pounds, 11 oz. much bigger, and i was actually induced at 39 weeks because of her size and the doctors' concern of rupturing my previously sewed-up uterus.
the current state of affairs: 3-4 cm dilated, 37 weeks & 3 days, currently 8 lbs 10 oz.
was that 8 pounds 10 ounces i said? why yes. yes it was.
and the good doctor told me i am 'not a canidate' for another vbac, due to his monstrous size. he said the only way i might be able to have him is if i go into labor in the next couple days. but he does not feel like he should induce labor, as he would only attempt that at 39 weeks, and even then, baby boy would most likely be 9 pounds and the risk would be much greater for rupture.
this was hard news to swallow for me. i hadn't even prepared myself to hear 'c-section'. i would rather bite a bullet and deliver this baby myself than go through that pain again.
so what am i doing in the meantime? walking. a lot. in fact, i'm about to go on round 2 of walking around the block. praying to Jesus, to spare me from a long slow recovery with two little ones. praying to Jesus to give me assurance that He is in total control of when and how he births His babies. thanking Jesus for a healthy baby.
and i might drink castor oil. maybe.